@VarietySpiceofLife23 its bad sorry, but I did it

Okay so Yourlocalhumanbeing (not tagging bc I didn't ask to tag) made a post about Kel Nuke

But just

This would work with hank better, not Gestalt

Because imagine

A child

Walks up to hank

All casual and shit (Kel has Kel Nuke set up already)

Hank tries to shoot the kid

The kid fucking dodges

And then hank gets fucking nuked

All the while Kel is like "haha bald emo man gets nuked full video on my yt channel"

You’re probably thinking that I’m crazy, but I’m not, let me explain

Gestalt’s health is 9x900 correct? That adds up to 8,100 hp.

There’s a strategy in OMORI called “Kel Nuke”

You make Kel Ecstatic to raise his damage output, he uses his flex skill to raise his hit rate and attack power (the Ecstatic emotion lowers hit rate) and you give him coffee to give him speed, and then you use Run n’ Gun

Run n’ Gun is a skill that does damage based on attack rather than speed. And Kel’s speed stat is pretty broken already. And with Flex and the Ecstatic emotion that boosts the power of Run n’ Gun even more.

With Kel at the highest level in the game (level 50) the max damage the “Kel Nuke” strategy does 4,633 damage

As I’ve already stated, Gestalt’s HP is 8,100

If you do Kel Nuke twice, that’s 9,266 damage

Conclusion, Kel is god, step down Phobos

Thanks for coming to this stupid ass post. Argue with me in the comments, I did the math

Edit:watched more videos, 4,633 isn’t max power Kel Nuke, so Kel could one shot

The inspiration:

Poor Sanford :(

I love omori so fucking much man, go play it rn it’s such a good game (it does contain topics that are triggering for some audience such as depression and suicide, so play with caution)

Aka arachnophobs hell

This thing is amazing-

I imagine Stygian holding more of a grudge against Phobos compared to the other Employers.

Since Stygian's job is to transport S3LFs to and from Nevada and the Other Place, I can see them being more angry than the others figuring out Phobos used Gestalt as a way to get of that process, along with the fact he used S3LF energy to place him beside/above Stygian and the other Employers power-wise.

Overall angry fireball.

Pinterest

Hi the ho st is go ne rn so um i dec ide d to po st this any way

~~~~~~~~

Doc knew exactly what was gonna happen here.

First, some agents would come in. Then, they’d ask him about his base, he wouldn’t answer, they’d beat him up a little, and then they’d kill him.

Easy-peasy.

He stared at the metal door a few yards away. It was so close. . . but his chair was bolted to the floor, and his hands and feet were tied. If he was strong enough, he could break the leather bindings. . . if he was Hank enough. . .

The door slid open and two agents wandered in, along with a half-MAG. “Hey, dissenter,” An agent sneered.

Ugh. “Hello, bootslut.”

The agent recoiled slightly but soon recovered. “You know what we’re here for, yes?”

Doc rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, you ask me questions, I give you jack shit, you torture and kill me. Done.” He sighed and leaned back.

“Eh, close enough. Listen, our pal Mason here,” he gestured to the half-MAG, “Is a bit pent up. We was thinkin’, maybe you could help wif ‘at.”

The trapped hacker lifted a brow. “Whadda you want me to do about it?”

“Fix him and we, eh. . . might letcha go.”

That was a fat fucking lie, a real flimsy fib. Doc sighed, frustrated. “Mmhm. Whatever. Couldja unstrap me here?”

The agents chuckled. “Nah, we like to see a struggle.” They walked out, leaving Doc and Mason alone.

Mason whined and sniffed the air. “What are you, blind? I’m right in front of-” The half-MAG removed his glasses, revealing an ugly scar over his cross. Oh. “Sorry.” Mason huffed.

He pushed his face into the stomach of the bound hacker. Doc’s body was larger than most, soft and squishy. The half-MAG took a long inhale of Doc’s sharp scent. The sterile smell would have stung the nose of any other, but the half-MAG seemed to enjoy it.

Suddenly, the intercom hissed. “Dude. Mason. You’re supposed to hurt him and shit. I know it’s your first day but like, c’mon man.”

Mason whined and pushed his face into the crook of Doc’s neck, opening wide and biting down as hard as he could- nearly cutting Doc’s jugular. Doc bit the inside of his cheek to keep from screaming too loud.

“Good job, Agent-L-554422! You will get a treat.”

Mason cooed happily, letting Doc bleed. He stepped back, then drooped when he noticed the scent of Doc’s discomfort. He reached a paw to cup Doc’s face and comfort him. Doc raised a brow, confused. Perhaps. . . he could use this compassion to his advantage.

“Hey. Mason, was it?”

Doc grinned when the half-MAG perked up. “You know those guys who brought you in? They want me to get hurt. Did you know that?”

Mason whined and stepped away, a stern look on his face. “No. . . nice men. . .”

Doc whimpered. “Maybe to you. They hate me.”

The intercom hissed to life. “Do not comply with him. You won’t get treats.”

“Bullshit,” Doc muttered. “Hey. Mason, do you like being called by name?” Mason nodded excitedly. “And do you like treats?” The half-MAG nodded again. “If you break me out of here, I’ll always call you by your name and I’ll always give you treats, okay?”Mason rushed to the bound hacker’s side, sniffing. The intercom hissed again. “Agent-L-554422, you’re going to be apprehended and killed.” The half-MAG paused.

“Don’t listen to them, okay? They’re gonna slow you down.” Mason nodded and ripped out the bindings.

“AGENT L-554422!”

Mason quickly hoisted Doc onto his shoulder- not unlike a potato sack- and burst through the door, much to Doc’s screaming protestations of ‘no, wait, I’m not ready’.

Agents quickly rushed to the scene, and Mason, not one to give up, started throwing, kicking, punching, doing everything he could to create space between him and the agents.

This was not a good strategy when the agents Mason was fending off had long range weapons.

“MASON!” Doc screamed, beating at his back. “JUST FUCKING MOVE!”

Mason, finally noticing that he was covered in bullets, rushed past the agents as Doc screamed. “I’M SHOT!”

Mason, deciding to take a shortcut, kicked out a window. “Mason.” he readyed Doc for the throw. “Mason.” He finally tossed Doc out and leaped after him. “MASON- ACK!”

The two lay there for a little while, adrenaline wearing off- for Doc at least. Mason was still very, very high on it. As bullets whizzed through the air he plucked Doc from the ground and rushed off into the wastes of Nevada. “Wait! We can take a car!” Cried Doc, all too late as they passed the vehicles.

Most of the vehicles, at least.

Mason tossed Doc into the back of an armored truck, ripped off the front door, and instantly crashed it into a closeby ravine meant to deter escape.

* * *

Doc awoke to see Mason, off to the side, hunched over. He seemed to be digging something. Doc tried to sit up, but winced at a pain in his side. Were the agents really that incompetent? Sure enough, he had only been shot in the side,legs, and shoulders.

Mason, on the other hand. . .

He was riddled with bulletholes, every part of him covered with them. He kinda reminded Doc of swiss cheese.

Mason seemed almost done with his digging, as he was just patting the earth he’d dug. Mason finally turned to Doc, teary-eyed. “Mister?”

Doc glanced around. “Yyyeah. . .?”

The half-MAG quickly draped himself over Doc, sobbing profusely. “You was is shot! You ain’tid gon’ make it!” he whimpered and whined and nuzzled into the very confused hacker, who simply pat Mason’s back.

“Did you. . . think that killed me?” Doc asked, a bit confused.

“Yes!” came the shouted reply from the distraught half-MAG. “Thought yous was is dead!”

Doc remained silent for a moment, petting his companion. “You’ve got a lot of bullets in you,” he whispered. “Say, if you keep me safe until I get home, I’ll treat them for you.”

Mason sniffled. “Promise?”

Doc nodded. “I promise.”